sometimes.

sometimes people disagree. sometimes there are hurt feelings and just sometimes..

 people dont know how grow up. 

ive learned a few things with dealing with people and their personalities. 

its been a struggle for me to remain in the thinking of "what would jesus do?" 

when someone is so mean and hurtful. 

but there are some lessons learned of what to do and what not to do. 

number one: always treat them with kindness, even if you go home crying or in my case, cursing. 

my momma always said "kill them with kindness"

and it works. 

number two: dont call names.

first, it just makes yourself sound dumb and

second, were not in kindergarten anymore. 

number three: really try to understand where they are coming from. 

it can help to end the disagreement well. 

number four: instead of getting mad and yelling at them,

 ive learned it best to hear them out.
  

and

number five: keep your cool. everything is better when you stay calm.

sometimes there are just going to be people we meet that haven't grown up.
sometimes we will meet people who say mean things.
and every time.. we need to be the bigger person.

by the way this post was meant to be put up a while ago. just never did.
im not mad. im not angry. im not upset.
just posting something.
thats all.

happy birthday to me

today is my birthday!

officially nineteen. yay!

so far its been great. i feel better, healthier and happier.

taking one day at a time. 

thank you again to all who have helped me get through this rough time. 

 especially to my wonderful man. i love you. 

i woke up this morning to strawberry crepes for breakfast. yum!

so with all the decisions we have to make, we have taken the day off. (thanks for the advise momma)

i think we all need to take a day off every once in a while. 

sometimes theres just too much to handle and we need a time out. 

so we are taking one.

and going out to dinner. :) 

thank yous

im doing great!!

because of you.

i owe you all. times ten. 

im still lonely at times BUT

i can be awesome. 

i am awesome. 

thank you for your kind, loving words.

in about 45 minutes i will officailly be 19!!! 

and im turning over a new leaf.

so thank you. i love you. 

feeling like...

crap. 

i dont think ive ever felt this bad about myself. 

ya, i know.. suck it up sarah. 

i dont fit into anything anymore.

i dont eat right.

i have horrible thoughts about myself all day long. 

i have no self confidence.

i compare myself to everyone.

chris and i have so much to figure out. 

where are we going to go to finish school? 

how will we afford rent this month?

what about dinner tonight?

med school? pt school?

utah?

idaho? 

cali?

stay here?

i sit at home and think about all of these things.

i think about life.

its too hard to handle right now.

ya i know it will get harder but im talking about the now. it stinks right now.

i know what i need to change. 

i know what i need to do.. its just hard to get motivated.

how do you get motivated when no one is there to cheer you on? 

im sick of waiting for things to happen. 

and being too lazy to do anything about it.

if anyone has any advice or words of encouragement, i sure could use them about now.

4th of july in hawaii

so this being the first fourth of july away from home, i was really worried about plans.

mom and dad always took care of the planning. 

we always had way to much food and way to much fun. 

so i was trying to make plans to live up to holiday i have had in the past.

chris and i tried to come up with ideas but everything fell threw. 

so we did our own thing. sometimes its too hard to please everyone. 

we drove up to turtle bay and hiked around for a while. 

we snorkelled, swam and found sweet shells. 

so after getting some sun on the beach, we started our way back home. we fired up the grill, cut some watermelon and made some sweet looking jello. 

its called "stained glass jello"

after eating chris' yummy barbeque chicken, we packed up the car and drove back to turtle bay.

the four of us (andrew, steph, chris and me) had our own surfboards, we parked on the side of the crazy traffic and walked in.. 

we walked out to the beach and put our boards in.

the fireworks started so we paddled hard (or chris paddled for me).

so we made it out and it was the coolest thing i have ever done for the fourth of july!

sitting out on the water with some of my closest friends and family, watching the fireworks. 

best fourth of july. 

hiking

a few days ago some friends asked if we wanted to go hiking with them. 

so of course we went! who doesnt want to go hike in the jungles of hawaii?

me. 

i attract mosquitos like no other. the last time chris and i hiked, i came back with fifty-two bites. 

ya, fifty-two!

this time we went on a hike back in kahana valley. 

there were old military bunkers and lots of beautiful views.

(lots of pictures ahead)

my muddy muddy feet

 gigantic leaves

the hike was about two and a half  miles of beautiful views like this..

we finally made it to the military bunkers

nakoa trail

thats chris swinging into the water from the rope swing.

 my lovely chris.. 

this hike was a blast. fairly easy and very fun. 

the only bummer part was the horrible mosquitos! 

this time we counted...

sarah

sixty-five.

chris 

four

new

as you can probably tell.. i changed things up a bit. 

i got this trait from my momma. 

the "i have to switch things up" trait. 

and i love it. 

so i did, it took me about two hours to figure it all out but i did it! 

another new thing..

chris decided he is going to be a doctor! 

ya.. its great. a sports medicine doctor. 

so med school, here we come!